Pain After Sex: 9 Common Causes and How to Relieve a Sore Vagina

Sex is supposed to feel good. After all, your body releases a ton of feel-good hormones, like dopamine and oxytocin, during sexual activity. So feeling pain after sex can really kill the postcoital mood—and leave you wondering why, when everything seemed to go smoothly, your vagina still wound up feeling sore and irritated afterward.

There are a handful of reasons why you might feel tender after sex. It could be a simple explanation: Perhaps you weren’t lubricated enough when things got hot and heavy. In other cases, however, pain after sex—or even during it—can be a sign of a more serious problem, like an infection or medical condition that requires targeted treatment. Especially if your vagina often feels sore, swollen, or irritated after sex, you may want to do some investigating.

Below, ob-gyns explain some of the most common causes of pain after sex and what you can do to relieve a sore vagina right away—plus, how to prevent future pain so you can enjoy intercourse to the fullest.

Is it normal to be sore after sex?

To be clear, no, sex isn’t supposed to be painful—and we’re not talking about consensual pain during sex; we mean the kind of sex that hurts when you don’t want it to.

“It’s not normal to be sore after sex unless it’s [your] first time and there was some stretching of the hymen to contend with,” Mary Jane Minkin, MD, codirector of the Sexuality, Intimacy & Menopause Program at Yale Medicine, tells SELF. Your hymen, the tissue that’s at the opening of your vagina, may stretch open the first time you have sex, which can be painful.

But just because it’s not normal to be sore after sex doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. In fact, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) says that nearly three out of four women will have pain during sex at some point in their lives. For some people, the pain is a temporary issue, but for others, it can be a frequent occurrence—and a huge nuisance.

If you’re sore after sex, there are a few things you can do to get relief. A warm bath, a heating pad, or a nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug (NSAID) such as ibuprofen could all help, Idries Abdur-Rahman, MD, an ob-gyn and cofounder of the Women’s Healthcare Group of Illinois, tells SELF. All of these things have anti-inflammatory effects, which can reduce some of the soreness.

The opposite approach can also help in the short-term if your vulva (the opening to your vagina) really hurts or is swollen after sex. Christine Greves, MD, an ob-gyn based in Orlando, Florida, tells SELF that she recommends applying a cold compress to the area. “Don’t apply ice directly to your vulva,” she cautions. Instead, wrap some ice in a clean cloth and either sit on it or lay it on the area (over your underwear) for 1src minutes or so to help tamp down on irritation and possible swelling.

Another tip: Give your vagina a break (meaning no penetration) until the soreness subsides. You may just need to give it some time. It shouldn’t take too long for the pain to subside, and if it persists, call your doctor.

Why does my vagina hurt after sex?

If you have pain after sex, or feel like your vagina is particularly sore after a routine romp, there’s a wide variety of potential explanations. Below, experts explain some of the most common reasons to feel sore after sex.

1. There wasn’t enough lubrication.

One of the most common causes of pain during or after intercourse that can lead to a sore vagina is inadequate lubrication. (Take notes, because this one’s going to come up a few times.) Everyone produces different amounts of natural lubrication, and there are plenty of reasons why—age, birth control, and other medications, including certain antidepressants, antihistamines, and blood pressure drugs, to name a few. When your vagina isn’t properly lubricated during sex, the friction can cause tiny tears in your skin and make your vagina hurt after sex. The biggest clue you needed more lubrication: The discomfort or burning is right around the opening of your vagina, Dr. Greves says.

To get some relief ASAP, Dr. Abdur-Rahman recommends putting a little lube in your vagina after sex. He likens it to putting lotion on your skin when it’s feeling particularly dry; it’s not too late to moisturize down there, and it can actually have a soothing effect. Just stay away from any lube with alcohol in it, which can make the burning worse. Dr. Minkin recommends buying a tiny bottle of something first so you can experiment and make sure you like it before stocking up.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: The easiest way to increase vaginal lubrication is by using lube. You can apply it to your partner’s penis, on a sex toy, or even directly on your vulva—experiment and see what feels best (here’s SELF’s guide to using lube).

2. You weren’t sufficiently aroused before sex.

Sometimes you’re just not totally in the mood, and that’s okay. But having sex when you’re not very aroused can also lead to lack of lubrication and, ultimately, a sore vagina afterward. Oftentimes, this is due to a lack of foreplay. “No foreplay means no arousal means no natural lubrication,” Dr. Minkin says.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: Foreplay, foreplay, foreplay! Getting in the mood causes your vagina to expand and naturally lubricate itself. “Lubrication is always important—and it takes time,” Dr. Minkin says. Rather than rushing into things, try communicating with your partner and showing them what you like in the pregame department. And, if you want to have sex but you feel like you’re not as aroused as you’d like to be, Dr. Greves says this is another instance where applying lubricant can come in handy. If after trying these things you still having a difficult time getting your head in the game, talk with your ob-gyn; they can help you figure out what’s behind your low sex drive and work with you to find a good solution.

3. Your partner or sex toy is seriously well-endowed.

If your partner’s penis, their hand, or the dildo they’re using is quite big, it can actually stretch your vagina, causing some minor tearing. Needless to say, that does not feel great—in fact, toys are one of the main causes behind vaginal injuries, research shows. According to Dr. Abdur-Rahman, this pain might even be reminiscent of menstrual cramps.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: Foreplay is once again key. According to Dr. Abdur-Rahman, in addition to boosting lubrication, foreplay also causes the vagina to expand (becoming larger, longer, and wider), which allows for deeper, more comfortable penetration. Once again, adding lube as needed will also help. If you’re using a toy, use water-based lube only (silicone-based options could damage your toy). And don’t be afraid to take it slow. This gives your body time to get used to the size of whatever is penetrating it.

From there, you should be thoughtful about your positioning. Any position that puts the person with the vagina in control of penetration is a safe bet. Think: you on top. Avoid positions that maximize penetration—like doggy style or anything that involves the vagina owner’s legs in the air—as these are more likely to lead to a sore vagina.

4. You had rough sex and it caused too much friction.

Friction can feel great, but too much can definitely make your vagina hurt after sex. Again, you may just not be wet enough due to lack of natural lubrication or insufficient foreplay. But, sometimes, having rough sex or a lengthy session in bed can just produce more friction than the sensitive skin down there is used to and leave you feeling sore after sex.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: Take whatever steps you can to ensure adequate lubrication. Foreplay is a great way to give the vagina time to warm up, and lube helps too. It’s also important to take your time—at least at first. Start gently and gradually transition into rougher, faster sex (assuming that’s what you’re into).

5. You’re allergic to latex, lube, or semen.

Some people are allergic (or sensitive) to latex. If you’re one of these people and you’ve been using latex condoms, you might end up irritating your vagina, Miriam Greene, MD, an ob-gyn at NYU Langone Health, tells SELF. You can also be allergic or sensitive to the ingredients in your lube or even to proteins in your partner’s semen. Dr. Greves says most people who have a semen allergy will suddenly notice a burning or itching sensation and their vagina will turn red. But this type of allergy is rare. “Very seldom is the issue a sensitivity to semen,” Dr. Minkin stresses. “I’ve seen that a few times in my career, but it’s unusual.”

A severe allergic reaction to any of these things can cause a body-wide response that results in hives, itching, or trouble breathing, usually about a half hour after exposure. If you notice any of these more severe symptoms, which can be signs of anaphylaxis, call 911 for immediate medical care.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: If your symptoms tend to be mild, you may benefit from taking an over-the-counter antihistamine before you head to the bedroom. If you suspect you might be reacting to semen in particular, Dr. Minkin recommends having sex with a condom (if you aren’t already) to see if that helps you dodge a reaction.

With any suspected sensitivity or allergy, if the itching or burning gets in the way of your ability to enjoy sex, talk to your gynecologist. They can run tests, like a skin prick exam, to see if you’re allergic or sensitive to latex, semen, or a specific ingredient in your lube (and make sure there’s nothing else going on). If you find you’re allergic to latex, you can switch to a non-latex alternative like polyurethane or polyisoprene condoms or the internal condom (a.k.a. female condom) to prevent disease and pregnancy. (Quick note: While polyurethane condoms help prevent both STIs and pregnancy, they have higher slippage rates than latex condoms.)

6. You have a vaginal infection.

If you’re experiencing additional symptoms beyond just soreness after sex—like itching, burning, bleeding during or after sex, abnormal vaginal discharge, or pelvic pain—you might have a vaginal infection. It could be a yeast infection, bacterial vaginosis, urinary tract infection (UTI), a sexually transmitted infection (STI), or something else entirely. Typically, these infections trigger inflammation in the vagina that can cause pain and discomfort, Dr. Minkin says. Some people may notice their vulva feels red and itchy too, Dr. Greves adds.

If you suspect you may have an infection, don’t self-diagnose or self-treat; see your doctor, Dr. Abdur-Rahman says. Depending on the infection, you might need prescription antibiotics, antifungals, or even steroids if there’s a lot of inflammation.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: Preventive methods are going to vary a lot depending on the kind of infection, and you can talk to your gynecologist to get their specific advice on what steps you can take in the future. That said, there are a few good rules of thumb. For starters, use a condom or dental dam if the type of sex you’re having calls for it (they prevent pathogens from getting into your vagina). This kind of barrier protection can help protect you from STIs. A second tip: Pee after sex to decrease your risk of getting a UTI. You should also avoid douching and using scented tampons, perfumed bath products, and vaginal cleansers or deodorants—all things that can disrupt the balance of bacteria in your vagina and make you more susceptible to infection.

7. You have a medical condition.

If you’re frequently in pain during or after sex, you may have a medical condition that’s making your vagina tender and raw. Additionally, symptoms like cramping, pelvic pain, or vaginal spasms/pain can also be associated with the below medical conditions, and therefore a sign that your pain from sex is due to a deeper issue.

Endometriosis: This happens when your uterine lining grows outside of your uterus instead of inside it. Usually it will grow on your ovaries, fallopian tubes, and the tissue lining your pelvis (in rare cases, it can spread beyond the pelvic area to your abdomen or lungs). Some people with endometriosis experience pain for hours—even days—after sex because the condition can cause inflammation in your pelvic organs.
Uterine fibroids: These are benign (not cancerous) growths that develop in and on the uterus. Fibroids commonly cause discomfort during sex, especially during deep penetration, as your pelvic organs shift or move around, SELF previously reported.
Vulvodynia: This is chronic pain—which can involve the vulva, the vestibule (the area around the opening of the vagina and the urethra), and/or the clitoris—that lasts for at least three months. It can make sex feel unbearable and is one of the most common reasons people with vaginas have pain during and after sex. Vulvodynia doesn’t have a clear cause, but it’s usually provoked by insertion of a penis, sex toy, or even a tampon; wearing tight clothing; sitting for a long time; or activities that put pressure on the area, like biking. Although many people don’t talk about it, vulvodynia is pretty common. In addition to a sore vagina, symptoms include burning, stinging, and rawness. The pain might be constant or occasional, and you may only feel it when the area is touched.
Pelvic inflammatory disease (PID): This happens when sexually transmitted bacteria spread from your vagina to other reproductive organs (including your uterus, fallopian tubes, or ovaries) and cause an infection. With PID, you may feel pain deep inside your pelvis during sex.
Vaginismus: This is when your vaginal muscles squeeze or spasm involuntarily, making penetration (whether it’s from your partner, a finger, or a toy) excruciating. Experts aren’t sure what exactly causes it, but anxiety disorders, prior surgeries, childbirth injuries, or a fear of sex due to past sexual abuse or trauma may lead to vaginismus.
Cervicitis: This condition, which is often caused by a STI, happens when your cervix—the lower, narrow end of your uterus that opens into your vagina—becomes red and inflamed.
Ovarian cysts: These common fluid-filled sacs develop in or on an ovary, typically during ovulation. Most are harmless and go away without treatment, but larger cysts can lead to bloating, a feeling of fullness in your abdomen, or pelvic pain. During sex, your partner’s penis can bump against the cyst, which can cause a stabbing sensation. (A quick note: Ruptured cysts can be extraordinarily painful and block blood flow to the ovaries, so it’s important to see a doctor if you have sudden, severe abdominal or pelvic pain.)
Myofascial pelvic pain syndrome: This syndrome causes the pelvic muscles surrounding the vagina, bladder, and rectum to become short, tight, and inflamed. (Think: a bad charley horse.) This can cause significant pain with sex, particularly with deeper penetration, and can also cause pain that goes to the lower abdomen, thighs, hips, or buttocks.

These aren’t the only conditions that can make sex hurt. There are many others, like a retroverted uterus, cystitis (bladder inflammation usually caused by a UTI), inflammatory skin diseases, irritable bowel syndrome, or hemorrhoids, that can make your genitals burn or ache. If you suspect a medical condition may be contributing to your pain after sex, schedule an appointment with your gynecologist, who will typically do a physical exam or an ultrasound to check for anything unusual.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: “Because the management options are so different in treatments, it’s best to see your ob-gyn,” Dr. Greves says. They may prescribe a treatment, like hormonal contraceptives, recommend switching up your medications, an OTC pain reliever, or refer you to a sex therapist and/or physical therapist. Depending on your condition, some positions may be more comfortable than others—talk to your partner and work together to find a style that works for you.

8. You have low estrogen.

Estrogen is a hormone that helps maintain your vagina’s lubrication, elasticity, and thickness. When your estrogen levels are low, you can experience thinning, drying, and inflammation of your vaginal walls. Over time, a dry vagina can lead to microscopic cuts that may burn or itch. Dryness related to low estrogen is a more common cause of painful sex after menopause, when levels of this hormone drop to an all-time low. Other times of hormonal upheaval that can lead to vaginal dryness include being freshly postpartum, breastfeeding, or if you’re taking anti-estrogen drugs for breast cancer treatment. Low estrogen levels can also result from eating disorders, autoimmune diseases, certain medications including antidepressants, and treatments such as chemotherapy or radiation.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: In many of these cases, you can’t prevent low estrogen entirely. However, if you’re going through menopause (or have been through it) and are having pain with sex, you can try using a long-acting OTC vaginal moisturizer two to three times a week. These products specifically work by lining the inside of your vagina with moisture, where it stays for several days, helping the vaginal tissue become healthier over time. “It makes the vagina feel better and more moist,” Dr. Minkin says. If any discomfort persists even after using a vaginal moisturizer for two weeks, talk to your doctor about other options—they can prescribe estrogen creams and tablets that you can insert into the vagina or a vaginal ring, which releases a low dose of estrogen over time. These can all help restore your vagina’s thickness and elasticity, ultimately making sex less painful.

9. You have scar tissue.

If you recently had a baby or had pelvic surgery, such as a hysterectomy or removal of a potentially harmful lesion, scar tissue could be “a possibility” for a sore vagina after sex, Dr. Minkin says. Scar tissue may form when a wound or surgical incision heals. If you had a cut, tear, or wound in your vagina “and it didn’t heal properly, that can indeed cause pain,” Dr. Minkin says. Scar tissue can make your vagina less flexible or prevent it from expanding or shifting around easily during sex.

How to prevent pain during and after sex: If you don’t have a lot of scar tissue, you may find that using lubricant during sex will help take away the pain, Dr. Greves says. But if that doesn’t do the trick, it’s really best to consult with your doctor. They’ll want to do a physical exam and recommend next steps from there, which could include pelvic floor physical therapy to strengthen the vaginal muscles or a vaginal dilator (a tool that gently stretches the vagina).

When to see a doctor about pain and soreness after sex

If intercourse causes you pain, don’t hesitate to talk to your ob-gyn. They will work with you to figure out why you’re sore after sex, and refer you to another specialist if necessary. If your doc isn’t taking your pain seriously or writing it off as a non-issue, find a new one (if that’s an option for you).

This article is a great starting point that can help you understand what might be going on, but it should never replace an honest conversation with a professional. And there’s nothing wrong with getting help at any point—sex is supposed to feel comfortable, pleasurable, and pain-free, and getting to the true cause of your pain during or after sex sooner rather than later will help you enjoy it as you should (and deserve to).